Have you had your daily dose ?

Thursday, March 09, 2006

HEADLINES: So you don't have to read them later

The Office on NBC is a rerun tonight, but I plan on watching it here’s the deal really quick:

I’ll give you the headline and a bit of the story from the actual writer and then, in italics, tell you what to think. This way you won’t have to waste your time being told what to think later by the real news media.

And away we go...

Dubai Firm to Give Up Stake in U.S. Ports

By DAVID ESPO and ANDREW TAYLOR, Associated Press Writers

WASHINGTON - Bowing to ferocious opposition in Congress, a Dubai-owned company signaled surrender Thursday in its quest to take over operations at U.S. ports.

"DP World will transfer fully the U.S. operations ... to a United States entity," the firm's top executive, H. Edward Bilkey, said in an announcement that capped weeks of controversy.

The announcement appeared to indicate an end to a politically tinged controversy that brought President Bush and Republicans in Congress to the brink of an election-year veto battle on a terrorism-related issue....

Bush (had) defended the deal, calling the United Arab Emirates a strong ally in the war on terror and pledging to cast a veto if Congress voted to interfere.

It is nice to hear that it’s finally over, one way or another. But here’s what always bothered me about this whole thing: Bush was absolutely outraged that people would be against this deal. “There is no reason to fear,” he seemed to be saying. But, I’m sorry, wasn’t it Bush and this entire administration that has been stoking the flames of fear since September 11th 2001? And now, NOW, we don’t have to be afraid anymore because HE said so? Doesn’t make much sense when you look at it from that angle.

Graham Speechless After New Orleans Tour

By MICHELLE ROBERTS, Associated Press Writer

NEW ORLEANS - Evangelist Billy Graham, whose ministry has taken him to some of the world's least-developed countries, said Thursday that the scope of devastation he saw as he toured hurricane-ravaged New Orleans this week left him speechless.

"I cannot imagine what those people have been through," Graham said during an interview with The Associated Press, a day after he was shown some of the areas hardest hit by Hurricane Katrina. "This is a far greater disaster than the average American understands."

Hey, you old bastard, didn’t you get the memo? Everything is fine there. Damn, don’t you watch the news? They just had Mardi Gras there, duh!! Things are getting back to normal. Listen and obey your government sponsored news programs, you codger.

3 Students Charged in Ala. Church Fires

By JAY REEVES, Associated Press Write

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. - For weeks, church congregants in rural Alabama were on high alert, eager to find out who was burning down their churches. The answer, authorities now say, was three college students who took a prank too far.

Ah, a silly prank. Harmless shenanigans. Kids these days, right? Seriously, these kids need to be sent to Singapore for a good, old fashioned caning. This is nothing that a violent ass beating with a stick wouldn’t cure. And then, just for good measure, put them in a cell for a few nights with a really well hung inmate who hasn’t seen a woman in a while. Ya know, for kicks and all.

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