HEADLINES: DOGSPUNK STYLE!!

Unfortunately it’s been too long, so, once again, here’s how we roll with the Headline segment here on Dogspunk: We take a real headline and a give you a little of the real story. Then, we make fun of it in italics. Simple enough. Today’s edition it short and simple. And even kinda sorta up to date. Way to go, Dogspunkers!

Study fails to show healing power of prayer

By Michael Conlon

CHICAGO (Reuters) - A study of more than 1,800 patients who underwent heart bypass surgery has failed to show that prayers specially organized for their recovery had any impact, researchers said Thursday.

In fact, the study found some of the patients who knew they were being prayed for did worse than others who were only told they might be prayed for -- though those who did the study said they could not explain why.


What if you pray for bad stuff to happen? Would that work? I've been praying for some time for Tom Cruise and Katie Holme’s baby to be born a quivering bubble of melted flesh. But the fucker is as healthy as can be. Well, as healthy as a baby could be being Tom Cruise’s son and all. Oh well. I'll keep trying. I still believe Jesus is listening.


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