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Thursday, May 11, 2006


David Blaine is a tool. There, I said it. Now, believe me, I used to actually like him. I thought his Street Magic specials were great. They excited people about magic during a time when interest in acts like David Copperfield were waining. So, what did Blaine do with his newly found fame? He became a cheap moronic stuntman.

Seriously, does anyone else remember when Davd Blaine performed actual magic tricks? I know he sprinkles a few card illusions throughout his specials now, but c’mon...what happened to the magic? Now he is just a guy who sits inside a box for a week while people throw tomatoes at him or something. My oh my, what will he think of next?

And that brings me to the point of this article. We are going to do a little experiment. Remember those fun little science experiments you would find on the back of cereal boxes and such? The ones that told you what you would need for the experiment about how to carry it out? Well, that’s kinda like what we are going to do today. Ours will be called “The David Blaine Experiment” and we will be trying to figure out, with simple science and probability, exactly what his next stunt will be.

Here is what you’ll need:

1) A suitable writing utensil

2) About 12 slips of paper large enough to hold short phrases.

3) Three hats, size and style not important

Here is what you do:

On the first four slips of paper, write down different containers that David Blaine will lock himself into. For instance, he has been encased in a block of ice, in a glass box, a water filled sphere, etc. So, for instance, write down “a block of ice” on one slip and go from there. You can actually use more than four suggestions if you want to use more than 12 total slips of paper Feel free to add new containers for Blaine if you think of something he hasn’t used yet. Heck, be creative. Science can be fun! Once you are done, fold the papers up and place them into the first of the three hats for later.

For the next step, you will do pretty much the same thing. But instead of writing down what Blaine’s container will consist of, this time you will write down how long he will be in it. 24 hours, 48 hours, a week, a’s up to you. Again, once you finish writing down the timeframes, fold the papers and place them into the second hat.

The final thing you’ll want to do for this stage of the experiment is to use your remaining paper to write down variables for Blaine’s stunt. Don’t be afraid to be silly or outlandish. For instance, you might want to write something like “people throw garbage at him” to illustrate how some of Blaine’s stunts cause people to act aggressively. Personally, one of my variables will be “midgets pee on him twice an hour.” Like I said, don’t be afraid to be a little silly. And once you are done, fold these final papers and place them into your third hat.

Now here is what makes it all worthwhile. Pick up the first hat and shake it to mix the suggestions up. Once you are done, pick one out at random. Do the same for each of the two remaining hats. Now unfold your slips of paper, add a little creative license, and unveil the stunt you have created for David Blaine!

When you have finished, you should see something funny that probably isn’t too far removed from what his next ABC special will actually be. Here is what I came up with in order of the draw:

A Pine Box. One Week. Elephants Poop On Him Daily.

So what does this mean for David Blaine? It means that I have predicted his next stunt to be one in which he locks himself in a pine box for one week while elephants poop on him daily. Someone call ABC. I think we’ve got a hit on our hands.

Now you try. It’s actually pretty fun. And the best part is, the more suggestions you put in, the more different predictions you will be able to make. So go wild and, if you’d like, share some of the ones you came up with by posting a comment below. We’d love to hear from you. Now, get cracking!

Read More Here....

David Blaine, Drowned Alive

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